StarLightWalker – Personal and Spiritual Growth

Obstacles: Sign Posts along the Path of Personal and Spiritual Growth

 Print This Post March 12, 2008 on 8:43 am | In Creativity, Emotional, Mental, Physical | 6 Comments

Whenever we set an intent to make a change in our lives, guess what tends to show up in our lives?  All of the obstacles and blockages that stand between our current circumstances and where we want to go.  At times it may seem as if the universe wants to test our resolve – are we really committed to making a change, or is this just a passing fancy?  And indeed, it is very easy to get discouraged when these “obstacles” show up in our lives, and this is a point where many people abandon their original intent or settle on a lesser target (the dreaded compromise).  At the other end of the spectrum we can view these obstacles as challenges that serve to test our mettle – to ensure that we are worthy of achieving our aims by compelling us to overcome these trials before reaching our intended destination.  Note, however, that in both of these perspectives the focus on us, or more specifically at what the obstacle means to us – either a road block or a challenge depending on our frame of mind.

Yet there is another way to view the circumstances that emerge once we set our intent: neither as obstacles that block our progress nor as challenges that test our sincerity and commitment, but rather as sign posts that help guide our efforts towards reaching our goal.  In this frame of reference these “obstacles” actually point the way to realize our vision, and serve to guide and steer those efforts so we do not stray too far from most direct path to achieving our goal.  From the stance of the creative these “obstacles” are simply features of our current reality that make the underlying structure of that reality evident.  In other words those very obstacles are notable features of the terrain we must navigate in order to realize our vision, and as such help to guide us along the path of least resistance.  It takes extreme presence of mind to remember this fact when these obstacles actually arise – a fact that I have been experiencing for the past several days.

Most of this past week I have been dealing with an obstacle that has been doing its utmost to teach me to appreciate this enhanced perspective – to see obstacles not as barriers to progress nor as challenges to be overcome, but rather as sign posts to help me effectively direct my activities towards my vision.  The specific obstacle that I have been dealing with has been back pain.

I awake on Sunday morning with a very noticeable pain on the left side of my back, just below my rib cage.  As the day progressed, the pain increased to the point that it was difficult for me to concentrate on anything else but the pain.  What was particularly frustrating to me at the time was that this “setback” followed right on the heals of an a spectacularly productive Saturday – I had made good progress on writing a piece I have been working on for several weeks and had also cleared off all of my home office paperwork (bills, insurance, etc.) so that Sunday looked like it would be smooth sailing for me towards my goal.  And yet in the end I ended up accomplishing very little of what I had intended to on Sunday, primarily due to the fact that I was flat on my back hoping the pain would subside.

Sunday night I got very little sleep as there did not seem to be any comfortable position for me to assume in order to rest, and whenever I shifted positions there were often episodes of severe cramping and intense pain.  So Monday morning when I woke I up I made an appointment to see my doctor, who evaluated me for a range of potential problems ranging from spinal damage and kidney problems to less serious conditions such as muscle strain.  Fortunately, at the end of his testing he concluded that I had simply strained one or more back muscles and prescribed an antiinflammatory drug as well as a muscle relaxer to treat the symptoms. 

I am not at all a fan of prescription medications, but despite this I duly took the prescribed dosages albeit with the expectation that they would not help much.  Guess what?  They did not help much.  What’s more, I am very familiar with the well documented placebo effect of medications wherein a patient’s expectation of what a medication will do has prevailing influence over the effects a patient experiences as a result of taking the medication.  These studies have not only shown that simple sugar pills can relieve symptoms if a patient expects them to, but have also shown that a person can actually reverse the normal effect of a drug such that a central nervous system depressant acts a stimulant and vice versa – all in accordance with the patient’s expectation of what the medication is supposed to do.

Clearly, it is reasonable to hypothesize that my lack of faith in the efficacy of the medications I had been prescribed has been working to counteract these medications, with the net result being that my back pain remains.  Now why would I do this to myself?  To prove myself right and the doctor wrong?  Then why spend the time, money, and effort to see the doctor in the first place?  All good questions, to which I have no good answer other than to admit that I was being a bit stubborn and stupid!

This morning I really focused on visualizing and affirming that ability of my medications to help my muscles soften and relax, and on assiting them in this task by mentally and emotionally softening and relaxing.  What this meant to a large extent was accepting the pain and staying present with it – breathing into it – rather than trying to force it to go away.  And guess what?  The pain has lessened in intensity and my range of motion has also improved somewhat.  I still have a way to go before recovering, but accepting and being present with my situation appears to have been much more effective than resisting it.  More importantly, working with the medications that my doctor prescribed to relieve my symptoms appears to be much more effective than working against them!  Duh!

What I find even more interesting is that this mini-episode at the level of my back pain medication was simultaneously being played out on a much larger scale in my mental and emotional outlook towards this week.  Up until today this has been a very disappointing and frustrating week – thanks to this pain in my back I have not been able to keep up with my blog, I have not been able to move forward on writing the piece I have been working on, I have not been able to exercise, and I have even fallen behind again on my home office paperwork.  And I had such grand plans for this week – it was going to be a watershed week for me, especially in terms of exercise and writing!  What a bummer!!!  As far as I was concerned this obstacle was nothing more than a roadblock that was preventing me from making progress towards my goals.

Is that really what my back pain represents at this moment in my life – a road block?  This morning I had the pleasure of participating in a telephone coaching session with my wonderful Spiritual Integrity coach, Trisha McWaters, and we spent most of the session exploring this particular obstacle and what it meant, both in terms of my immediate goals and in terms of my longer term path of personal growth.  I should mention that my coach is especially good at helping me to step back for a moment and really ponder obstacles such as these from a fresh perspective: why is Spirit presenting me with this now?  What lesson is it trying to teach me?  Our discussion of these questions really helped to expand my perspective on what this obstacle meant and also confirmed and solidified a number of notions that I had been exploring as I lay on my back each day after I got home from work.  Could it be that this obstacle was actually trying to help me reach my goal more effectively?

One of the perspectives that our spiritual practice emphasizes is that of mirroring – that the people and circumstances that manifest in your life tend to mirror inner dynamics that are occurring inside of us.  So why would I manifest back pain at this particular juncture?  As I thought about this, and the possible events that could have triggered the muscle spasms that are causing the pain, my upper body workouts – and in particular weight lifting and Body Works – immediately came to mind.  This was the first time I had ever really placed significant demands on the muscle groups in my upper body, so it is probably not surprising that they had difficulty responding to those demands and had a negative reaction.  Moreover, as I thought about my “plan” for achieving my goal of transforming my body it occurred to me that I has been pursuing an outside in approach – attempting to manifest the appearance of the physique I desired by reducing my waistline (diet, nutrition, and aerobic exercise) and increasing my upper body definition (weight training focus on my major muscle groups).

My reason for initially focusing on these particular aspects of physical training to achieve my goals?  Simple: these efforts were most likely to produce visible, tangible results.  In contrast, working on the framework to support that musculature and physique – and in particular I am thinking here of core stabilization and stretching exercises such as yoga, Pilates, or basic stretching routines – will not necessarily alter my appearance dramatically.  But they will build a strong foundation upon which I can erect the physique I have envisioned, and more importantly they will provide a foundation that reduces the chances of me injuring myself by over-training major muscles without first developing a stable core.  Could it be that Spirit was pointing me towards taking an inside out approach to achieving my goal rather than the outside in approach I had decided to adopt?  Hmmm . . . build the foundation first – a strong and flexible core – and then focus on developing and refining the physique: kind of makes sense, doesn’t it? 

So maybe, just maybe, this obstacle is not a road block at all, but rather a sign post pointing out the most direct path to the goal I have envisioned.  Perhaps for someone more highly attuned to Spirit’s messages it would not require a slap across the back to get their attention, but unfortunately for an alpha male achiever such as myself Spirit sometimes needs to pretty much stop me dead in my tracks before I will pay attention.  The one thing I can definitely affirm is that this back pain has definitely got my attention!

So what have I learned as a result of this obstacle?

• Resisting what is – reality – is generally not a good strategy for navigating towards your goal!
• Obstacles can perhaps best be thought of as navigational aids rather than road blocks to be circumvented or challenges to be overcome.
• Clinging to your plans in the face of radical changes in your circumstances can close you off from the messages that your new circumstances are sending you.
• If you stop to look, listen, and feel into what an obstacle has to teach you it will often suggest an alternative path to achieving your vision that may be superior to your planned “direct” route.

Two final things before I close this post.  In looking for something to help illustrate my new perspective on obstacles I happened upon an absolutely wonderful website called Nana Gaia.  This website features an art form known as haiga, which is a combination of visual imagery and haiku poetry.  I would like to thank Steve Sorensen, the author of that site, for permission to share this wonderful example of that art:

And last but not least I would like to thank my Spiritual Integrity coach, Trisha McWaters, for helping me to take the time to consider my most recent life events, and especially my back episode, from a fresh perspective.  Trisha has been working with me since I began my spiritual journey in earnest at the beginning of 2007 and interacting with her is always a joy and an adventure!